Scene 3

(the next morning, Jane is eating breakfast in front of the TV)

Peter Jennings: Today-

Jane: (spitting out cereal) Aren't you dead?

Peter J: No, I'm not. Anyway, otday a body was found in a house. Yeah, yeah, very interesting. The body was identified as Crissy Kayex, who attended Kang Chicken University. She was a freshman. Freshwoman, sorry.

Jane: (spitting out more cereal) WHAT?!

Elliot: Hi!

Larry: Hi!

Elliot: You

Larry: know,

Elliot: it's

Larry: nearly

Elliot: time

Larry: for school.

Elliot: CONGRATULATIONS! YOU ENDED THE ONE WORD DRAUGHT- oh, shoot. (runs)

Larry: ARGH! (runs after Elliot wielding a knife)

Jane: OK... again. Anyway- (resumes eating cereal)

Peter J: The body was found in front of the computer, with its neck twisted 720 degrees.

(Jane winces)

Peter J: Let's now go to ABC reporter Dan Banjo, live.

(TV goes to front of house, with Dan B reporting)

Dan B: Thanks, Pete. I am standing (in nasal voice) in front of the house- uhh... *ahem* *aheeeeemm* (in normal voice) of Crissy Kayex, the victim of the murder. Let's go check on what Crissy's mom said earlier to reporters today.

(changes to a fat woman weeping with reporters surrounding her)

(Jane chokes on her cereal)

Crissy's Mom: (overdramatic) She was a good kid. I can't imagine who would want to kill my poor baby! (sobs)

Jane: (disgusted) I wonder how Crissy survived that monstrosity. Oh, look at the time!

(she gets up, gets her backpack, and leaves)

Fade to black...